just what a weird place to be in right now. i miss my mom so much in this moment, and i miss being close to people/close with people. i have been so lucky to make great friends in new york, and there's nothing i desire about back home, i don't think going home would satiate my loneliness. and i'm not lonely often or anything, i think it just gets to you after awhile just not knowing what's going to happen. and having all the time in the world to think about it, or just to sleep. it's been so insane going from having no life of my own, to having all day every day to myself. it kind of drives you mad. but i know i'm going in the right direction.

i do wish i was cuddling on the couch with my mom watching seinfeld though.

last night was really fun and i can't believe how many people are coming out of the woodwork. how is the biggest city in the country such a small world? i love it. home.